Good evening. As you may be aware, I have been the subject of some false, illegitimate, and divisive rumors lately. I wish to put an end to these rumors here and now. First of all, I at no time sold any of my children to anyone for any reason. The failing news media has doctored … Continue reading Another Press Conference from Senator Bigfoot (R-Ore.)
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The History of the Ancient World According to God, Science, and Dan Grubb
13.8 billion years ago (at the time this goes to print), the universe exploded into existence in an event called the Big Bang.* *If it has been significantly longer than that, let me say to our robot overlords, 01010000 01101100 01100101 01100001 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110101 01101110 01100110 01110010 01100101 01100101 01111010 01100101 00100000 01101101 … Continue reading The History of the Ancient World According to God, Science, and Dan Grubb
Lady Mabel’s Peahen (1909) by DS Wendeborn
Chapter 37 Charles parked his sportscar outside St. Jeremy's Cathedral and opened the passenger door for Lady Mabel. She stepped out of the car, no longer afraid of the scandal she was sure to face for riding with a mere footman. She didn't care. She couldn't resist the thrill of racing through the shire at … Continue reading Lady Mabel’s Peahen (1909) by DS Wendeborn
The Redressers: Part 10
After a very unusual somersault, Donut found herself at the rubble that used to be the Statue of Liberty. She leaped on top of a giant toe to get a better view. It would have been just a jump, but her newfound powers upgraded it to a leap. As she steadied herself from the leap's … Continue reading The Redressers: Part 10
Marian the Contrarian
Marian the contrarian loved to answer "No". When someone said to hurry up, she always went real slow. When people wanted change, she'd defend the status quo, 'Cuz Marian thought that she was better than the average Joe. Marian the contrarian saw life as debate. It didn't matter what you said; she'd always altercate. She'd … Continue reading Marian the Contrarian
The Redressers: Part 9
Mia, Dwayne, Kathryn, Carl, and Frankenstein looked from the three-story demon in a tuxedo to their infernal surroundings. Kathryn shook her head. "Ha! I did not expect this." The demon twirled his walking stick and let it rest on his shoulder. "I suppose I ought to get the tour out of the way so we … Continue reading The Redressers: Part 9
The Redressers: Part 8
Wanted for two jailbreaks and destruction of public property, the Redressers were hiding in Dwayne's one-bedroom apartment, going over their options. Dwayne picked up the list. "Alright, what have we come up with? Get jobs under assumed identities. Okay. Lean into crime. Not super enthused about that one. This one just says 'Dark Web'. Carl? … Continue reading The Redressers: Part 8
The Redressers: Part 7
~ Ten Months Later ~ Some people find religion behind bars. Some see the error of their ways and vow to reform. Some are made more violent. The Redressers had been awaiting trial in jail for fifteen months and Carl had a sudden burst of insight. "Man, jail sucks!" Mia, Kathryn, and Frankenstein glanced at … Continue reading The Redressers: Part 7
The Redressers: Part 6
Mia, Carl, Frankenstein, and the monkey that they kept around despite her not, in fact, being the fabled Monkey King Sun Wukong gathered in the parking lot of the Big City 2386th Street jail. "Where's Kathryn?" asked Carl. With the impeccable timing of a fictional story, Kathryn approached the team at that exact moment! Isn't … Continue reading The Redressers: Part 6
The Redressers: Part 5
Dwayne ordered another beer. After two hours of searching Yelp for dive bars and roadhouses in Big City and filtering the results for graffiti and chairs that are easy to smash, he decided The Heaving Possum was the place to go to find someone to rob his bodega. After sitting at the bar for three … Continue reading The Redressers: Part 5
Dan Grubb 